Baby's In Black
by Pekenota14
Summary: Your love is marrying another woman? Dress in black. But who the hell dresses black for a wedding party? A widow, of course. (Angst-y Clintasha, Clint/Bobbi, Natasha/Tony friendship)


Natasha slowly rolled up the black tights up her legs. Her eyes rose to the mirror in front of her and she studied her own facial expression. Downcast, tired, defeated. She couldn't really understand why she was feeling like that. Slipping into the black dress, she pursed her lips together and took a deep breath. She put on her black heeled shoes and ran her fingers through her mussed hair, simply combing it with that gesture.

Tony put up a small after-wedding party for the newlyweds, Clint and Bobbi, now husband and wife. Natasha didn't show up at the wedding, faking an urgent pending issue to solve. Truth is that she didn't go because Bobbi, innocently, asked her to be her bridesmaid and she had refused it. Besides, the thought of having to stand there and watch the wedding made her stomach twist, especially because Clint rehearsed the vows with her, as a way to prepare himself for the day. The way he recited those few lines made Natasha shatter into pieces. Still, she was going the small gathering; Clint was still her best friend, the best partner she ever had, it was his special day and she wanted to be there for him. At least for him.

Walking in the Tower, full of guests, Natasha skillfully managed to avoid each and every person that wanted to speak with her. She tried to make herself invisible, walking to the drinks. Looking around her, everyone was cheerful and dressed colorfully. She was the only different person among everyone. Who the hell dresses black for a wedding party? A widow, of course. Seeing Clint smile broadly made her give up on walking to the newlyweds. While everyone is celebrating, the widow is mourning what she has lost.

Natasha grabbed a glass and the whiskey bottle and walked outside to the balcony. If anyone would ask, she'd just say she didn't see the happy couple, which was something impossible as they were the main characters of the party. Tony walked to the balcony, having spotted her, and rattled the melting ice cubes of his cup, to get her attention. She looked back, her face completely unreadable. He presented his cup to her and she filled it.

"Hypothetically speaking," Tony began, taking a sip of the whiskey. "there's only you and Bobbi, no one else around, so no witnesses. She's hanging from the cliff; do you push her or pull her up?"

"Pull her up. She's Clint' wife."

Tony breathed thoroughly and said. "Ok, this is worse than I expected." Natasha looked at him, demanding an explanation from him. "What was the deal between you and Barton?"

"It was complicated." She briefly answered, closing her eyes as the light evening breeze brushed her hair.

"That's the kind of thing people put on _Facebook_." He went mute for a while, continuing. "I always thought that Clint was head over heels for you. The way he spoke about you, and how he seemed to be able to do anything in his reach to keep you safe… And now he's married to another one. I was actually rooting for you two."

"Looks can be deceiving, isn't it?" She dryly told him.

"Yes…" Tony gazed her face; she was hurting and she was fragile even if she wasn't showing. "Looks can be deceiving." If anyone was watching the scene, one would say that it was Tony the one who was hurting the most. "How can you even stand here?"

"Clint's my best friend and my partner; I had to be here for his special day."

"How do you feel about this?" He insisted.

"I was schooled to feel nothing at all, but… I'm happy for them. They're starting a new phase in their lives."

"Tell me," Tony gulped the drink he had in his glass. "don't you feel jealous, angry… sad? Nothing…?"

Without taking her eyes of the setting sun, she said. "I'm upset, maybe."

"Upset that now he'll be sleeping every day with another woman, trusting her with his life, protecting her? Upset that now there will be someone else before you?"

Natasha looked at him; she was on the verge of tears, and if she was going to cry, it wouldn't be there, and let alone in front of Stark. "He found someone who can give him everything he deserves."

"But…" Tony started, feeling down as well. "but you two were a match."

"Two broken pieces aren't a match just like two walls alone don't make a home… Clint and I would never work. We're both wrecked, and we need to find people who can compensate for our dysfunctional personas."

"What are you going to do now?"

"Going solo…" She told him, looking down. "The council has approved my request."

"Good luck… I guess…" Tony simply said, walking inside again.

Natasha wiped one tear that rushed down her face. Did she really mean that little to Clint? Maybe if she had said things, done things… But she never really knew how to cope with emotions because she was never taught how they feel like. The only one she knows is pain, and just because she's really familiar with it, it doesn't mean it's okay to make her suffer. But she knows Clint didn't do anything wrong. He simply moved on; if she was not going to be the one for him, why wasting time with her? She'd still be his friend and partner. Well, not partner anymore; it would break him when he'd hear about Natasha going solo.

Who the hell dresses black for a wedding party? A widow, of course. While everyone is celebrating, the widow is mourning what she has lost.

* * *

**I apologize for any feelings I may have caused you...**


End file.
